Dear Blog

Hello, it's been awhile. I lot has happened in the last 11 months, blog. I've changed, and I can see that you have changed as well.

But I think that there is still something between us. And in any event, I think I need you now. Let's see if we can kiss and make up.

I'll be back.

Smells like... burning?

I think I mentioned earlier that I am getting crafty and making save-the-date cards for the wedding.

I originally just wanted to make business card sized magnets, but noooooooooooo, I decided that wasn't good enough (the font would be too small, etc).  So now I'm working on something slightly more elaborate and maybe just a little bigger than the size of two business cards. 

It's been fun so far.  I haven't had the opportunity to make something in a long time.  Of course, the fun starts to wear off when you realize the quantity that needs to be made! 

Tuesday night I worked on formatting the card using Photoshop.  I couldn't get the resolution to look good. The font was extremely fuzzy.  After much cursing and smashing the desk, I learned a lot about Photoshop... simple things that I probably should have already known.  I had made the image the same size that I actually wanted it. Apparently for the best resolution, you should make it enormous and then shrink it down.  I finally made it 5 times the size I wanted it and then shrunk it.  Also, some fonts are just too smooth and will never look crisp when printed in this way.  Palatino Linotype, while a pretty font, just can't get crisp enough.  I finally switched to Georgia italics and it looks much better. Lastly, .jpg is NOT the best!  You need something that won't compress the image out of control.  I used .bmp because MS Word does not recognize .psd (the photoshop file type).  .tiff would also have been acceptable.

Wednesday night I praised God that my fiance used to be a teacher.  He owns one of those paper slicing things that has the arm you move up and down to chop paper.  His particular version has a sliding blade that worked very well for the small size I was trying to chop the paper down to.

Last night I used an art knife to make slits in the heavier paper I plan on using as a border.  I finished it early enough that I had time to start rubber stamping and embossing the stamps.  Everything was going fine until ' The Office' came on.  I figured that using an embosser (which makes a noise like a hair dryer... and is actually quite similar to a hair dryer) while fiance and I were watching the show might be distracting.  So instead of embossing the stamps on the old coffee table where I'd been doing it, I moved my papers down to the carpeted floor.

I embossed a few cards and then noticed that the carpet looked pretty dirty, there were all these stiff brown patches that I assumed was hardened, caked on dirt.  I moved to a cleaner area and kept working, but after finishing a few more cards it seemed that the "dirt" was following me.

Well, it wasn't dirt... it was me BURNING the carpet.

If we lived in a house and this was my personal carpet, I'd probably flip my shit.  But since we live in an apartment where the carpet was already not up to par when we moved in, I managed to contain the shit flippage.  But, I can't believe that that tool could have been burning the carpet.  I tried cutting out some of the burned patches with scissors... but it's just not good. 

The carpet was bad when we moved in, but I don't think I've helped the situation any while we've lived there.  There was one patch on the floor that looked like a trail of dripped soda.  "Resolve" cleaner wasn't working, so I moved to "Oxyclean."  "Oxyclean" didn't get all of the dark patch (whatever it actually is) and it bleached the surrounding area of the carpet (at least the carpet is cream colored??).  It's not a pretty sight.  I just hope they don't charge us too much when we move out...

There are warnings on products about everything under the sun, but I didn't see any "beware of burning carpet" comment on the embosser box.  I just see "can reach 680°F" and "be careful."  Yeah... always work on a firm, non-flammable surface while embossing.  And, another good rule of thumb, keep me away from your carpet.

No Closeups, Please

Incase you were wondering, Internet, the engagement party on Saturday night went extremely well. 

It was very casual, there was lots of food, my mom's three tiered cake turned out incredible, tables were set up in the yard with candles on them and confetti with our names written it, there were plenty of drinks, and the white lights in the trees looked great.  Fiance's mother had someone make a DVD slideshow of photos of he and I growing up and then as we got older.  It was pretty cute.  One of my only complaints was that I felt like I couldn't talk to and hang out with everyone I wanted to... the evening felt so short and I was running back and forth between people.  I was so busy running that I didn't eat much of the delicious looking food - I was just too excited!

But, I was disappointed that more people didn't take photos!  I didn't get a single posed photo with my maid of honor or any of the other bridesmaids.  Hell, I didn't even get a posed photo with my fiance!

There was one woman with a super fancy digital camera who took pictures throughout the night, but she was really only doing candids.  And not just candids... candid closeups! 

So if anyone wants to see some REALLY high definition closeups of my face where you can get a great look at SWEAT, hair frizz, red eye, tooth yellowing, moles, or any other imperfection I have got a boat load of great pics for you!  Consider it your lucky day!

I don't mean to sound ungrateful (although.. I guess I am...) but the experience has made me so thankful about the photographer we've hired for the wedding.  Our photographer does a mix of digital and film photography, and she retouches everything.  Thank GOD!  I need something to soften my fanged, sweaty dinosaur look.

I keep checking back to the website where the photos are to see if I've missed just ONE good photo of me, but it's just not there!  It also makes me want to go nuts about my hair yet again!

Let's just hope I'm more photogenic come July 2008...

The Question

Have you ever heard the quote, "Life is a comedy?"

How about, "Life is a tragedy?"

I used to love Ani Difrano... before she got so consumed with George Bush that I just couldn't take it anymore.  In one of her songs she puts it artfully,
"and we lie in our beds, and our graves
unable to save ourselves
from the quaint tragedies we invent- and undo,
from the stupid circumstances we slalom through"

Some days we are the world.  Our sadness is the world's sadness, and we can't understand that while we crumble from pain the rest of the world goes on.  While someone loses a friend or a mother, another spends $500 on a pair of heels... another finds out he or she has cancer, another gets a promotion, another is looking for meaning and lost, another is finding Jesus, another is born again, another celebrates.

Some days things seem small and the universe is vast.  And we look up at the stars and we just see blackblackblack and twinkling, and we know that our job is small, our love life is small, our hobbies are nothing, our country, our war, our people, and our planet is nothing but another pulsating speck in an ocean.  If you looked out closely and carefully, you couldn't even distinguish between our colors and our lights.  Sometimes that is terrifying, sometimes it makes us feel inevitably bound to one another and comforted.

Suffering and happiness are such small things, but it's everything.  When job stress is compared to life and death, does it mean anything?  And if not, then why do we punish ourselves? 

I don't think that life is a game of winners and losers, but I'd still like to be prepared.  Artists waffle about this question constantly.  Stevie Nicks asks,
"Can the child within my heart rise above,
Can I sail thru the changing ocean tides,
Can I handle the seasons of my life?" 

Everything I thought that would be difficult about being older turns out to not actually be one of the nagging, multifaceted questions that I'm not sure if I'll ever answer.  I don't think about them every day, but some days I wake up and the question explodes; five fingers across my cheek just to make sure that I know.  The stinging says, "I'm still here, bitch." 

Fiddleheads

Fiance's parents are throwing an engagement party for us this Saturday.  This party has been quite the ordeal, as I think I've said before.  But I think... I hope... that in the end we'll all have a great time.

To prepare for this momentous event, I decided it was time again to brave the hair salon and spruce up my hair with some highlights.  I was able to make an appointment at the same place I got highlights a few months ago, although the stylist I saw last time was booked.

I'm always nervous about going new places and having a new stylist, but I have to admit that Tina at Fiddleheads in DC gets two thumbs up!  Not only did she give me great highlights, but she also styled my hair effortlessly so that it looked great!  I was so pleased that I bought some Aveda Be Curly Curl Enhancing Gel.  Hopefully on Saturday I will get the same lovely results!

Having curly hair is tough stuff... but there's my shameful plug.

Fiance and I are currently watching Undeclared on DVD.  It's cute, but not life-altering.  They didn't get to make that many episodes before the show was canceled.  After this show I think fiance has finally roped me into watching The Wire.  I've only heard incredible things about it... so we'll see!

As for fall shows, so far I've been uninspired.  What are you watching, Internet?