It's a Big Coincidence or a Big Conspiracy

You thought you'd be spared from listening to me rant about law school some more?! HAHAHA, you lose!!

First thought I should really keep in mind, the best thing to help me make up my mind about law school is law school itself. As I get closer to that building I want to projectile vomit all the way into Ohio. Sitting in the class rooms, listening to the professors put on their high and mighty 'we rule the world, you lose forever' attitude.. ugh!

And today was an ESPECIALLY crazy day, though!

First, as I walked into my first class this morning, trays of cupcakes were all over the tables. Now you know, there's nothing I love more than cupcakes. Plus, they were funfetti cupcakes! We're talking serious crack for me! Instead of excitement though, fear struck my heart. The last time there were cupcakes in contracts it was because this girl had a nervous breakdown over the weekend and then thanked us all (for ?) and told us how proud she was of us.

Well, today was no different. But I did help myself to a cupcake.

In my next class a girl bitched at the professor. It was really weird. All the laid-back guys suddenly woke up from their daydreaming and started making loud comments about how this was 'just like middle school.' She tried to defend herself, but when you're crazy... you're crazy!

In my last class of the day, the professor told us how worried she is about all of us because we don't realize how much debt we're going to be in 'for the rest of your lives' ... and how little we've learned... and worried she is for our futures. Yes... yes....

I must say, it hurts me that I don't enjoy this more. I always fancied myself a scholar, an academic, a cut above, a thinker, a lover of knowledge. I feel like this should be right up my alley. But I can't fake it; it's NOT!

Law school googling of the day reveals this fun piece:

Law school is held up in the humanities as the great rationalizer--that which will offer the artsy kid who majors in English because he likes to read passage into a lucrative, steady, mobile, potentially socially responsible career. At Penn, at least, a large number of English majors go on to law school, which their parents respect, and which as such justifies majoring in English (which many parents, thinking about how much tuition they pay, and how little earning power Jane will have with her B. A. in women's writing, do not respect). On the surface of it, this works out for everyone: English majors do have good luck getting into law school, and all that practice close reading novels and poems serves them well when it comes time to studying the textual and logical intricacies of the law.

If you're lucky, you'll end up at a big firm where you'll make decent money right off the bat. But even if you're quite smart, most of you won't. Fortunately, almost all of you find a job. But it'll pay only about $20,000.00 US. You'll make this for about 5 years, all the while working at least 60 70 hours a week. And here's the kicker, only about 50% of you will survive. You put in 5 years of slave labour and at the end about half of you are too tired/exhausted/burnt-out/bored/sick unproductive to go on. The profession counts on about 50% of you to do grunt work and then move on. Sound familiar.

It just keeps getting better from here (I've bolded particular areas):

The work itself is absolutely brutal. You need a thick, thick skin. Even if lawyers are sometimes unfairly maligned, by the very nature of the work you often find yourself in what is just about the moral sewer of the universe. A law office is a perpetual crisis, and there is always someone on the other end trying to prove you are wrong. And yet, while in these and many other ways, the work is incredibly difficult, and while it certainly requires what I call cunning, there is rarely much to directly challenge the intellect. You find yourself, incredibly, both absolutely bored and absolutely terrified.

So where does your interest in the arts or humanities fit in. Like to do any serious reading, well forget about it. In Search of Lost Time is just not compatible with 60-70 hour weeks. Survive those first five years, and maybe you'll only be working 50 hours a week. But perhaps, just perhaps your wife/husband/girlfriend/boyfriend will want to spend some actual time with you after barely seeing you for the last half decade. Not to mention children. No my friend your life of the intellect is OVER. This profession is one where you succeed only if you eliminate every other real interest from your life. You are a priest of the law; you must commit yourself absolutely to her. She is very jealous and admits of no rivals.

Just to interject again, this next paragraph is another argument I've tried to give my parents. They won't buy it, though... they won't buy any of it.

One thing is for sure, a legal career is not for someone who has any serious interest in the arts or humanities. At best you'll be able to cuddle up to your money at night after your long day of mindnumbing, soulless work, and at worst you'll end up as tired, and as broke, as ever a jobless humanities PhD. And to my mind, if you're going to suffer, better to suffer for something you really believe in, like John Milton or Emily Dickinson, rather than suffer for the statutory code of Nevada or your boss's bank account.

But, it's easy to just hate all over law school and lawyering. It's an easy target.. fish in a barrel. That's why I got that book (see post below) to help me look at things rationally and make a calm decision. I don't want to go nuts here.

There are a bunch of comments to this post. I didn't read all of them cause they started to make me panic a bit. But here's one that I thought was decent,

But here's a big secret: It's not really about the job -- but about YOU.

You see, also like everything else in life, being a lawyer will be rewarding in a fashion commensurate to the effort and sincerity with which you pursue it. There's nothing magical about the occupation: it won't make a happy person out of a cretin, and it won't destroy someone with clarity of purpose.

If you go to law school by default, or because your parents want you to, you are going to be miserable. But you'd be miserable no matter what you did, because you don't really have any idea what it is you want.

The reason the law chews up people and spits them out is the same reason grad schools chew up people and spit them out: there are a LOT of people there who don't really want to be there -- they just didn't know what else to do.

So for the wayward English Major who thinks law school is a ticket out of uncertainty, I can only say one thing: the only ticket out of uncertainty is certainty

I am afraid of that. What if I'll be miserable at anything because I don't know what I want? But the flip side, guess you don't know what you want until you try it and either love it or hate it.

Pissed off Lawyers

Hasn't any law student ever noticed how many PISSED OFF lawyers there are out there? The simplest search about law school brings back page after page of wild results. Check out this:

"law school is a big lie. People enter law school with the idea that a law degree is their ticket to a comfortable upper middle class lifestyle. In fact, just the opposite, law school for most is a ticket to a worse financial state than if they had not attended at all."

You see? Angry lawyers... the internet is crawling with them. Yet still, no one does their research before going to law school [insert nervous looking picture of me here].

Olympic Foibles

I, sadly, have to agree with most of this. American Idol was better than most of the Olympics. I did watch much more of the Olympics than ever before, though (I think this mostly has to do with the fact that I'll do anything to avoid my legal studies... or at least, to make them less sour).

I've watched figure skating since the early 1990's. I would say that the figure skating this year was a joke and a huge upset, but skating always seems to go like this. Figure skaters are such emotional athletes.

Who can forget the Tonya Harding and Nancy Kerrigan incident? Or all the times Michelle Kwan flubbed up her open door to the gold? She had a million excuses.... "I changed coaches, now I decided to triumph on my own without a coach, now blablabla"

yeah, yeah, yeah... I'm not impressed.

shmoo/schmoo, revealed

I don't like not knowing what things mean. And I didn't want to get excited and start using a word that actually meant feces or something.

Wikipedia says:

A shmoo is a fictional cartoon creature, created and first drawn by the cartoonist Al Capp in his newspaper comic strip Li'l Abner. The shmoo is shaped like a plump bowling pin with legs, but no arms. They reproduce asexually, and are very prolific. They require no sustenance of any kind.

This frightened me. So I read on...

"Schmoo" is also an endearing term for a pudgy human child. I.E. "What a cute little "Schmoo" you have."

Whew!

Plenty of Scorn to go Around

The weather is beautiful for this time of year... the kids outside are yelping and playing, the neighbor is working on miscellaneous bizarre art projects on the porch, the smashed up car from Super Bowl XL is still next to the telephone pole. So why am I not out enjoying the day?

I'm in law school, staring at an appellate brief that needs to be completed.

Yes... and on this fine day it has incited my wrath.

Take these fine blogs for example: Shmooed Food and Vegan Lunch Box. Why do they get to be so awesome? I'll tell you why...

"I'm a stay-at-home mom with a work-at-home hubby and one groovy little shmoo. I'm a vegan activist who loves to cook (and eat!)."

I don't have a hubby or a groovy little shmoo. I am neither a vegan (although I love exploring it) or an activist (at least not in the proper use of the term). I am not going to rant about how unfair it is that 'some people get to stay at home and do whatever they want and others have to go to work and bust their butts to make a living and put food on the table and are unpaid, overworked, and unappreciated and life is a big machine and we're all slaves to the grind and just wanna make a better life for our kids....' blaaaaaaaaaa, ad nauseam.

Because when you get right down to it, I'm envious of this woman. I'm envious of her adorable vegan lunch box, her knitting, her staying-at-home, her little shmoo (whatever the hell that is, probably a kid, but it still sounds spectacular... I'm calling my hypothetical child a little shmoo as well), her work at home hubby, the whole shabang.

I'm also jealous of my boyfriend who is currently, as I type away, being hooked up with a new, totally sweet ass computer... all for the grand total of $530 (our friend is helping him build it).


And of my landlord, who today sent me in a postcard in the mail from Falcon State Park.

"This is one of our favorite parks for birding. We're seeing colorful orioles, jays and flycatchers. Sibley [their dog] enjoys the exotic smells of coyotes chavalina [wtf is this?]. We're eating lots of Texas oranges, avocados, and grapefruits!"

Yeah... you guys have a blast. I'll be fine in Snowsylvania.... Coldsylvania... ILoveToWhinesylvania.

Of course, I love seeing people that are really making the most of things. It's probably the most inspirational thing I can think of. It helps me see that life can be so many different things, and that I don't need to be scared of it.

Every day for approximately the last 4-5 months (wow, it seems so much longer than that) I have contemplated pulling the plug on this career path. And for the last week, I feel like I've finally climbed the mountain and I'm looking over the edge. Man, I'm just like Frodo and the Ring. I want to throw it into the fire, but I'm also scared. It's been with me for so long. Throwing it away means changing a part of me, losing something. Even though I know it's not what's best for me. Part of me wants to keep it, just to avoid the pain. Good thing Sam is there to give me a good kick in the ass!! ("Sam" knows who he is... although he probably either stopped reading this ridiculous extended metaphor or he hurt himself when smacking his forehead with embarrassed discomfort).

Don't worry, the Ring is about in the fire. I'm just saying some parting words. And I will dump the metaphor now as well.

Further, if you're thinking about law school, do not go right after college. Even if you've 'known it's what you've wanted to do since you were 5, have been working your entire undergraduate career to get there, have done menial tasks at a law firm before, have a family full of lawyers, everyone's telling you that you'd be so great at it'... again, ad nauseam.

These are not good reasons. If I could change your mind by getting on my knees and begging/pleading that you need to really get experience in a law firm (doing legal research and writing) AND nonlegal experience AND conduct informational interviews with lawyers to see what you might like to do (because you will not have time to figure it out when you get there... trust me, you lose) before you go, I would do it. Sure, everyone's experiences and goals are different, but having more experience if you do choose to go later will only help you and set you ahead. The older law students I know are all happy... it's us younguns who love to fuss.

Go buy this book by Deborah Schneider (JD holder) and Gary Belsky (dropped out). I wanted to post the introduction to the book (I scanned it and mailed it to my Peace Corps friend in Africa; this is how strongly I feel), but I'm scared of copyright death. It is really great because it helps you take an honest look at your ideas about law school. It guides you into making an informed decision that you will feel good about. And that, my friends, is the key.

Decisions you're dissatisfied with, yet you commit to for life, means no vegan lunch box or little shmoo, no sweet ass computer, no bird watching and coyote chavalinas at Falcon State Park. You don't get an award for making yourself miserable. Think about it.

How they named their companies

Some very interesting explanations for how companies got their names

i have a few favorites...

Yahoo!- a "backronym" for Yet Another Hierarchical Officious Oracle. The word Yahoo was invented by Jonathan Swift and used in his book Gulliver's Travels. It represents a person who is repulsive in appearance action and is barely human. Yahoo! founders David Filo and Jerry Yang selected the name because they jokingly considered themselves yahoos

Fanta- was originally invented by Max Keith in Germanyin 1940 when World War II made it difficult to get the Coca-Cola syrup to Nazi Germany. Fanta was originally made from byproducts of cheese and jam production. The name comes from the German word for imagination (Fantasie or Phantasie), because the inventors thought that imagination was needed to taste oranges from the strange mix.

Apple- for the favourite fruit of co-founder Steve Jobs and/or for the time he worked at an apple orchard. He was three months late in filing a name for the business, and he threatened to call his company Apple Computer if his colleagues didn't suggest a better name by 5 p.m. Apple's Macintosh is named after a popular variety of apple sold in the US. Apple also wanted to distance itself from the cold, unapproachable, complicated imagery created by the other computer companies at the time had names like IBM, NEC, DEC, ADPAC, Cincom, Dylakor, Input, Integral Systems, SAP, PSDI, Syncsort and Tesseract. The new company sought to reverse the entrenched view of computers in order to get people to use them at home. They looked for a name that was unlike the names of traditional computer companies, a name that also supported a brand positioning strategy that was to be perceived as simple, warm, human, approachable and different. Note: Apple had to get approval from the Beatle's Apple Corps to use the name 'Apple' and paid a one-time royalty of $100,000 to McIntosh Laboratory, Inc., a maker of high-end audio equipment, to use the derivative name 'Macintosh', known now as just 'Mac'.

backpack through Europe, but don't forget the cards

Two of my friends are traveling to Europe this summer, and therefore I need to insert a plug for a truly must-see hostel in Berlin, Germany.

See webpage for details that I cannot give you.

Why is this hostel so awesome? For starters, open your eyes and look at the frickin picture! It's clean, and it's not only new and fresh looking - it has style. How many hostels can you say that about? (notice the American flag and t-bone steak picture on the wall in the back)

The Circus in Berlin was also where we had our most ridiculous experience of the trip... we were chased by German undercover police... at least, we think they were. Long story short, always buy your tickets for the underground. It also doesn't hurt to have a travel buddy who can cry on command and has the face of a new born baby.

Later in Florence, Italy, when a group of American teeny boppers on a bus ask you whether or not they should buy their pass, and you relate your whole German-undercover-police-chasing-extravaganza, and they still don't buy their ticket, and the Italian undercover police go after them because they obviously didn't listen to your story... know that they aren't very bright, and that you are probably have some public transportation curse.

Further, do not go to Europe without UNO cards; people of all countries can relate to UNO. Notice the motley crew below UNOing the night away in Paris, France. Even guys like the one on the far left, who left his home in New Zealand to crush grapes for cash in France, likes UNO. When asked if he planned on being in France for a long time, he answered, 'I guess so, I bought a car.' There you have it... such levels of intimacy may be reached during an UNO game.

The girl on top thought that she could use the moment to impress our friend from New Zealand, by repeating her undying love for all things from the country... to which our friend replied, 'I don't really like New Zealand.' So, even though UNO will work wonders for your social life in Europe, if you are lame in America, you're probably still lame in Europe (possibly more lame).

Go to the Circus (Rosa-Luxemburg), and bring UNO.

don't make flapjacks on my fucking freak-ass stove

i don't have any food...

i don't have time to go to the grocery store to get more food

i DO have time to create a blog and whine, though... take THAT

While I have not stooped to Stu's level of eating 12 egg whites, I have stooped to the level of breakfast for dinner. Some people in college think this is a treat when the cafeteria serves breakfast for dinner. Young adults who live alone know that breakfast for dinner means someone is too lazy or too broke to go to the grocery store to get some real food.

Not only that, but I just sat here amazed as after 5 minutes my pan was still cold. The burner was on high, the pan was on the correct burner, yet no heat. "Ah," I said, "it's just an old house," and I continued to wait.

After about 10 minutes I realized, no... you freakin dumbass... the handle is so heavy the burner is so crooked that half the pan is in the air and thus, not even on the burner.

So I put it down...

... so I then burned the hell out of my flapjacks.

And then I ate them all out of spite.