Whinny whinny, neigh neigh

Ahh.... sweet, sweet slumber.

Only to be awoken at 2am by a Charley Horse!

It's hard to describe a Charley Horse to someone who has never had one. Boyfriend once exclaimed, "I think I just had a Charley Horse." Oh, no, my friend... oh, no... if you had a Charley Horse - you'd know!

Mine have always been in my calf muscle. I've had the occassional warning that one is about to occur in my foot, but I can usually control those before they explode. The calf muscle becomes stricken with intense, burning pain. You think, if you could just calm down and not touch or move your leg it would go away. This is actually one of the worst things you can do. You're supposed to stretch it, but moving your is so horribly painful. All you can do is writh around, trying not to scream so as not to completely terrify the person sleeping peacefully next to you.

This is impossible. They'll wake up. They'll think they just entered a scene from a horror movie.

Wikipedia says that common causes of Charley Horses are:

* Sore muscles after exercise
* Hormone imbalance
* Mineral deficiency
* Dehydration

But, really,

* Sore muscles after exercise - You've probably picked up on one of my main gripes lately; I feel off the gym wagon. No, I didn't fall off, I snuck off like a rat!
* Hormone imbalance - Why?
* Mineral deficiency - I even took vitamins that day (and I hate taking vitamins), and I had a strawberry/banana smoothie.
* Dehydration - Sure, I don't drink enough water... but why now?

I'm not satisfied with the answers I found. You lose, Wikipedia. But, something even better than a Charley horse:

Here's a video of an incredible dancing horse.